Loman rushes in where Flabbergast fears to tread. Showing up on Switzer's doorstep in Afbaghistan, he's intent on locating Healey's clinging wife, Allie, before Stelaphane makes her disappearance permanent.

LAST MONTH in ARMY@LOVE:
Insurgents attack a Paco Lipsync concert, but the troops are there to save the day (even though they end up accidentally blowing up the band. Oh well...). As the dust settles, FLABBERGAST professes his love for SWITZER. The two of them celebrate by getting it on again on the battlefield - but at least this time, in the comfort of a nearby RV. It all ends in laughter, though, when Switzer finds a love charm hidden in Flabbergast's uniform and realizes that's the real reason for his infatuation.

HEALEY'S having a meltdown now that STELAPHANE has brought ALLIE to Afbaghistan to manipulate him. A move that sends LOMAN to Afbaghistan to find her, after he puts PEEBLES' henchmen NEEDHAWK and BLANCH in the hospital.

It's the super-efficient secretary WOYNER, though, who comes up with a solution to the Allie problem. She goes straight to Stelaphane and works out a deal to get ALLIE out of her husband's hair by putting her on a plane with a one-way ticket to parts unknown...

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